10+ Tips for Rural Living
Huyck Preserve, Rensselaerville
September 9th marks my first anniversary living in rural upstate New York after 19 years in Los Angeles. By now, the story of my moving here sight unseen has become a popular tale among friends. What I didn’t realize is how many people thought I wouldn’t be able to handle the isolation, the brutal winters, the humid summers, and so on. Who knows, there might have been a bet or two on how long I would last!
But I proved the naysayers wrong and adapted to my new surroundings well. For anyone considering making a similar move from the big city to a rural area, here are some suggestions on how to make it work:
Be outgoing
Assuming you're not a total hermit, the best way to meet people and learn information in a rural area is to be outgoing. Don't be shy about asking for introductions. In the beginning, I met people through a few key introductions by people who live here, or who used to live here. I also ventured out on my own and introduced myself to folks. It helped to cast a wide net.
A new friend showing me and Ruby a fabulous swimming hole in Leeds
Get referrals
One of the challenges of moving anywhere new is leaving behind your trusted mechanic, dentist, veterinarian, etc. Sometimes it takes years of trial and error to find these folks. When I moved to this area, the first thing I did was ask the guys at the local feed store to recommend a good veterinarian and bike repair shop. Others recommended a great mechanic, dentist, chiropractor, massage therapist, and more. The people who live here know who's who and what's what.
Classic car, Oak Hill
Find common ground
A new friend who also happened to move here recently summed it up perfectly: “I’m on a mission to make friends.” That means being proactive - finding groups that interest you, and activities where you might meet folks. It also means sometimes going out when you don't feel like it, going out alone, doing things you wouldn't normally do... basically stepping out of your comfort zone. I have traveled an hour or more to get to an event or visit a friend. It's always worth it.
Get a part-time job
Obviously, not everyone can do this... but I would highly recommend working part-time at a local business. Earlier this summer, I was fortunate enough to learn of a chef's assistant position at a local farm-to-table cafe. I applied for it even though I've never been a chef's assistant before, and got the job. Working at this popular local spot lead to not only meeting more people, but also learning more about agriculture, cooking and animals.
Be "social"
There is an actual saying here called "being social" that describes when a person stops to chat with you before, during or after performing a service. For example, when my mechanic Bill works on my car, he chats with me and makes me laugh (his nickname for me is "California Niva"). Same with lady at the post office. Rarely do I just fly in and out of the post office without saying hello to Barbara, or us chatting for a few minutes. The last time I was there, she gave me a marrow bone for my dog. The point is, slow down and get to know people a little.
Be a good neighbor
Social interactions are really important in a rural area. It's not just about making friends. People can also be resources, especially your neighbors. You might need to take refuge in their house when your power fails in a storm. So, get to know their names, say hello and good morning and have a nice day. When they wave to you, wave back! My neighbor Bob, who's in his 80's, and I became friends after he said Ruby could play in his fields. We've since had many philosophical conversations while standing in his fields. When his wife recently passed away, I baked him a pie and brought it over. I also helped him with his yard sale, and he lets me share a raised bed in his garden in return for my help with wedding and planting.
Start walking
I've seen some amazing scenery while walking through my neighborhood and met people too. I also think there's something good about being seen on a regular basis. Every day I pass this one farm where a dog lives that is friends with my dog. The owners and I don't talk much, but whenever they see us coming, they let Bronson out so he can play with Ruby. Even the farm workers recognize Ruby and wave to us from their trucks as we pass.
Support local businesses
This goes without saying. Local businesses remember their customers, and will greatly appreciate your business.
Be a good guest
In the country, people invite you to their homes a lot faster and more often than in the city. Any time you go to someone's house, bring something or, even better, make something.
Nectarine and blueberry upside-down cake
Pick up after your dog
One might think that in the country, it's okay to not pick up after your dog. Wrong! People are really sensitive about their yards and property. I always pick up after Ruby, even in fields where no one can see us. I did, however, make the mistake shortly after moving here of throwing the bag in someone else's trashcan. In the city this wouldn't be a big deal, but after a few times, a woman came out of the house to ask me to stop because the bags were making her trashcan smell. Noted! Now I carry the poop bag all the way home and throw it in my own trashcan.
More suggestions:
Invite people to visit you
Travel and explore the area
Be nice to everyone you meet because everyone knows each other!
Living in a rural area can be a fulfilling, rich, culturally diverse experience. But just like living in the city, you have to work it!
