10 Steps to a Happier Place

To make up for yesterday's 10-bullet-points-of-kvetching post, for which I apologize to the readers and The Universe, here are 10 common sense reminders (in no particular order) of what to do when you're down. And by you, I mean us.

1. Get Some Rest - If this means going to bed earlier, taking a nap during the day, sleeping in your car or under your desk at lunch (been there!), or asking your partner to let you sleep an extra 15 minutes, do it. It's amazing how much better you feel when you've had enough sleep. Yesterday was a prime example of what happens when I'm tired. I get cranky, bitchy, whiny.

2. Have Fewer (Unrealistic) Expectations - If you're a working adult with multiple responsibilities, if you're a single mom (if you're single, period), if you're grieving, sick, or healthy and simply overwhelmed, if you're human, then you know there are only so many hours in a day, and you have only so much energy. Be realistic. Make your To Do list as long as you want (mine is pages long) but realize you will not get to everything at once. You will get to what you can. And that's okay.

3. Be Easy on Yourself - Do you beat yourself up about all the things you do wrong? Or the things you didn't do, rather than the things you did? Do you compare yourselves to others and wonder what's wrong with you that you can't accomplish the same? Stop! This is useless energy that doesn't help you or anyone who has to deal with you. Every person is different. No person is perfect. If it takes you longer to reach your goals than others, this doesn't mean you're a lazy bum. It means you're human. And you'll get a whole lot more done if you redirect the negative energy towards something positive.

4. Be Grateful - I know it's a cliche, but some cliches are good and this is one of them. Even in our darkest moments, we can find something that will make us smile, if only for a brief moment. The sound of children's laughter, the rainbow the sprinkler makes in the morning sun, the breeze in our hair, a song. Maybe it's simply looking around and recognizing what we have instead of what we don't, the blessings in our life instead of the curses. Again, I know this is harder said than done sometimes, but it's worth keeping in mind. Even the unlucky are lucky in some way. The challenge is figuring out how.

5. Focus on Yourself - Not in a narcissistic way, but in a don't-worry-about-what-he-or-she's-doing way. Focus on yourself. The only thing on this earth that you can control is you.

6. Take Your Vitamins - Eat well, drink water, get up and move around every now and then, and yes, take your vitamins. Besides being a healthy (and these days, necessary) supplement, they can actually improve your mood and energy level. I had skipped my vitamins the last few days but this morning I took them and no lie, I feel better.

7. Be Friendly - Say hello to people that pass you by. Say please and thank you. Tip your servers. Give someone a compliment. Hold the door for a stranger. Let other cars pass in front of you. I don't mean be fake, but little gestures of genuine kindness can make a world of difference to others and to you.

8. Watch Bad Television - Whatever constitutes "bad television" to you, sometimes it's okay to indulge in it. Personally, I consider reality TV bad. But I admit to watching a few shows. Project Runway is my favorite. But I will sometimes leave American Idol on in the background while I'm doing other things. And more recently, I've been watching The Face, which is a combination of America's Next Top Model and The Voice. Totally ridiculous but Naomi Campbell is one diva beyotch and thoroughly entertaining.

9. Help Someone - Helping others is good for them, good for you, good for the world. It can also add a sense of meaning to your life. You can never go wrong.

10. Think Happy Thoughts - I've always been a moody person and my mother used to say this to me a lot when I was a kid. My late husband used to say the same thing, in his own way. I couldn't always manage it as a child or an adult, but I try and I think it's good advice.